As somehow who also quit their corporate job (going on two years now) in order to found a startup (and failed several times now, but still trying), I understand what you're going through. You feel like you're floating in an ocean with no direction when you suddenly shed your corporate structure. In many ways you begin missing the structure, you begin missing the guidance, you begin missing the artificial deadlines that feel much more important than they really are.
What's been especially difficult is the feeling that you're not creating or producing. You get this feeling artificially when you accomplish something for the company you work for. But when you work for yourself and especially if the thing you're working on fails, you feel like "what am I doing, have I even accomplished anything?".
This feeling is perpetuated when we see our friends continue to move up in their career and we are static, working on our own things. Thoughts creep into your head like, "if I fail on my own, will I have set back my career if I choose to go corporate again?". Our brains have this feature of ranking ourselves among our peers based on income and profession. This ranking has a direct correlation to our happiness. Make sure that you continue to remind yourself of the great things you've done in the past and the things you continue to accomplish and work on today.
Stay disciplined, keep your self talk as positive as possible, block out feelings of envy when your friends are getting raises and promotions at their corporate jobs, and finally remember why you are going on this journey. The "why" is what will motivate you to continue for this path is the hardest of them all.
You are such an inspiration Kinsey. This was a bold move and I’m sure not an easy one to take, a little Jerry McGuire’ish ;) did you take the fish? They have manners you know.. I hope this next chapter is rewarding for you
I’m facing similar challenges as a stay-at-home mom. For most of my life I have catered to my family. I have helped my husband become the best in his line of work for the last 20 years. I have raised babies for last last 10 of those years and 2020 highlighted something so vividly for me- I don’t know who I am or what I’m capable of. I have only gone as far as they needed me to- never as far as I am capable of (I don’t think). I have been kind of lost this year- I’ve been searching my life for a place that I can invest in myself too. I admire your balls and drive. Most definitely will follow your progress and look forward to reading your insight! Thank you!🙂
Hey Kinsey. I graduated with my MBA at age 27. After I graduated, a mere couple weeks after turning 28, I officially entered the marketing profession. It lifted me out of my previous profession into a much more fulfilling life.
Think of Morning Brew as your MBA. Now aim for elevation.
Just found you from a friend who said "this chick is pretty cool." She's right!
I like your question, and even more, liked the replies. Lots of folks who are redefining themselves, albeit not all in job shift the way you were. It's funny, early on, I always defined myself as being the youngest to achieve x. The youngest to win the school spelling bee. The youngest valedictorian. The youngest you'd ever dated. The youngest electrician. The youngest....
And then I hit a marriage to someone who was easily threatened and I made my achievements smaller and smaller and smaller until I stopped trying to achieve. After it ended, I moved on to study the next thing I'd wanted, and suddenly found myself the oldest.
And you know what? I never would have selected that path, but it was oddly satisfying and reassuring and comforting to be the oldest. The oldest one in the sport. The oldest to graduate from the program. The oldest first-time mom. All if it felt like an awesome investment.
I believe it’s important to review what we call « work » and have it a more wholesome approach. Work could be seen just as any activity so we undertake to live and grow: reading is work as we use this moment to learn and dream, working out or sleeping is work as we need this to be healthy, socializing is work as we are social animals we need to work on our connections with others and that helps our creativity...
So overall we work all the time and among this the « economic » work which is supposed to help us make a living. But more than anything it’s also a place for personal growth and accomplishment so think of it more as a way to fulfill an other of your fundamental and biological need and this one would be meaning, purpose and enlightenment.
Yes we need to get paid but that’s a contextual and systemic issue. Overall we need more than that. Once you approach life as a wholesome experience made to help you find happiness, satisfaction and growth it’s easier to follow a path guided by your values, ethics and sense of purpose :)
Easier said than done but anyhow it’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey ! If the next step fails it’s ok, there will be great things along the way.
My wife of 27 years, that I made my world revolve around, decided the spark wasn't there anymore the day after Xmas. I'm alright and everything now (well, at least after staying drunk for a month, really), but my entire adult life has been defined as being one-half of a whole, and quite frankly I have no idea what to do with myself now. I'm 48... starting anything new at this point seems like a foreign concept really, but my entire identity? I feel like I'm having to put together Ikea furniture, but with the instructions in a different language and no pictures. Like, where the hell do I start? Perhaps now's the time to look at that taco truck I always wanted to run.
I love your determination and drive, and certainty that you're doing the best for yourself, It will be cool to see what you're doing next. Hopefully the spark will be contagious and I'll catch it. I'll be there for the IG Live wine tastings when I can - they clash with hike time, but sacrifices may have to be made I guess. Or I could just be the guy wandering around Washington State parks with a bottle or something. :)
The amount you will grow from your “time to go it alone” will be something you will always look back upon favorably. Good luck. Keep writing, moving and smiling.
As somehow who also quit their corporate job (going on two years now) in order to found a startup (and failed several times now, but still trying), I understand what you're going through. You feel like you're floating in an ocean with no direction when you suddenly shed your corporate structure. In many ways you begin missing the structure, you begin missing the guidance, you begin missing the artificial deadlines that feel much more important than they really are.
What's been especially difficult is the feeling that you're not creating or producing. You get this feeling artificially when you accomplish something for the company you work for. But when you work for yourself and especially if the thing you're working on fails, you feel like "what am I doing, have I even accomplished anything?".
This feeling is perpetuated when we see our friends continue to move up in their career and we are static, working on our own things. Thoughts creep into your head like, "if I fail on my own, will I have set back my career if I choose to go corporate again?". Our brains have this feature of ranking ourselves among our peers based on income and profession. This ranking has a direct correlation to our happiness. Make sure that you continue to remind yourself of the great things you've done in the past and the things you continue to accomplish and work on today.
Stay disciplined, keep your self talk as positive as possible, block out feelings of envy when your friends are getting raises and promotions at their corporate jobs, and finally remember why you are going on this journey. The "why" is what will motivate you to continue for this path is the hardest of them all.
You are such an inspiration Kinsey. This was a bold move and I’m sure not an easy one to take, a little Jerry McGuire’ish ;) did you take the fish? They have manners you know.. I hope this next chapter is rewarding for you
I’m facing similar challenges as a stay-at-home mom. For most of my life I have catered to my family. I have helped my husband become the best in his line of work for the last 20 years. I have raised babies for last last 10 of those years and 2020 highlighted something so vividly for me- I don’t know who I am or what I’m capable of. I have only gone as far as they needed me to- never as far as I am capable of (I don’t think). I have been kind of lost this year- I’ve been searching my life for a place that I can invest in myself too. I admire your balls and drive. Most definitely will follow your progress and look forward to reading your insight! Thank you!🙂
Hey Kinsey. I graduated with my MBA at age 27. After I graduated, a mere couple weeks after turning 28, I officially entered the marketing profession. It lifted me out of my previous profession into a much more fulfilling life.
Think of Morning Brew as your MBA. Now aim for elevation.
Just amazing :) Glad I'm subscribed!
This was epic Kinsey.
Just found you from a friend who said "this chick is pretty cool." She's right!
I like your question, and even more, liked the replies. Lots of folks who are redefining themselves, albeit not all in job shift the way you were. It's funny, early on, I always defined myself as being the youngest to achieve x. The youngest to win the school spelling bee. The youngest valedictorian. The youngest you'd ever dated. The youngest electrician. The youngest....
And then I hit a marriage to someone who was easily threatened and I made my achievements smaller and smaller and smaller until I stopped trying to achieve. After it ended, I moved on to study the next thing I'd wanted, and suddenly found myself the oldest.
And you know what? I never would have selected that path, but it was oddly satisfying and reassuring and comforting to be the oldest. The oldest one in the sport. The oldest to graduate from the program. The oldest first-time mom. All if it felt like an awesome investment.
Signed,
The youngest executive at my company.
I believe it’s important to review what we call « work » and have it a more wholesome approach. Work could be seen just as any activity so we undertake to live and grow: reading is work as we use this moment to learn and dream, working out or sleeping is work as we need this to be healthy, socializing is work as we are social animals we need to work on our connections with others and that helps our creativity...
So overall we work all the time and among this the « economic » work which is supposed to help us make a living. But more than anything it’s also a place for personal growth and accomplishment so think of it more as a way to fulfill an other of your fundamental and biological need and this one would be meaning, purpose and enlightenment.
Yes we need to get paid but that’s a contextual and systemic issue. Overall we need more than that. Once you approach life as a wholesome experience made to help you find happiness, satisfaction and growth it’s easier to follow a path guided by your values, ethics and sense of purpose :)
Easier said than done but anyhow it’s not about the destination, it’s about the journey ! If the next step fails it’s ok, there will be great things along the way.
God, what a question. Good timing.
My wife of 27 years, that I made my world revolve around, decided the spark wasn't there anymore the day after Xmas. I'm alright and everything now (well, at least after staying drunk for a month, really), but my entire adult life has been defined as being one-half of a whole, and quite frankly I have no idea what to do with myself now. I'm 48... starting anything new at this point seems like a foreign concept really, but my entire identity? I feel like I'm having to put together Ikea furniture, but with the instructions in a different language and no pictures. Like, where the hell do I start? Perhaps now's the time to look at that taco truck I always wanted to run.
I love your determination and drive, and certainty that you're doing the best for yourself, It will be cool to see what you're doing next. Hopefully the spark will be contagious and I'll catch it. I'll be there for the IG Live wine tastings when I can - they clash with hike time, but sacrifices may have to be made I guess. Or I could just be the guy wandering around Washington State parks with a bottle or something. :)
What you are going through is a necessary part of your journey. If you would like to talk to a sympathetic listener, call me.
Great work Kinsey. Questions we all have to ask ourselves once in a while. Good luck w/ new gig.
The amount you will grow from your “time to go it alone” will be something you will always look back upon favorably. Good luck. Keep writing, moving and smiling.